I'm pants shitting drunk right now
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
