So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
