the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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