I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize