She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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