I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
