Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
