Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
