We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
