I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Randomize
