What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
