you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize