Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
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