White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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