Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
