I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
