i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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