Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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