omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
