Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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