and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
