the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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