Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize