D3 body, D1 cock
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
