Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
