haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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