just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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