I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize