He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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