i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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