Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
