That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Found your dick twin last night
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize