just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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