I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
