That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
no you cant smoke seaweed
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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