That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
