They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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