and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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