yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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