He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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