What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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