Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
