$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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