Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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