oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
