Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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