physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
