stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Randomize
