And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
