Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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