when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
