"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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