I am in a vortex of obligation.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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